Humility and active addiction are like oil and water, they do not mix. However, humility is imperative to recovery from addiction. Step one in A.A requires surrender. It requires admitting you are powerless over drugs, that you need direction and don’t know how to live a happy life. If done correctly, it crushes all of your pride and ego. That moment of surrender is very humbling and grants relief. I have checked into rehab countless times and have been willing to admit I am powerless over drugs but it has been much harder for me to completely surrender ALL areas of my will and life. I was terminally unique. After a few days, weeks, or months, my pride and ego would swell. I would stop listening and start magnifying differences instead of similarities, and take my power back. This inevitably always ended in another miserable relapse. The moment I stop living in gratitude, acceptance, and humility, I start taking back control. I always end up in the same place, completely out of control and powerless. I have to remember my best thinking got me into a lot of horrible situations and ultimately into the rooms of A.A. It’s only when I surrender, take guidance, and live in humility, that I truly regain power and am in recovery from addiction.