I have noticed that I deal with grief in the same way that I deal with most of my problems; In addiction, in drowned my feelings with drugs which stuffs the emotions down and keeps them stored away and hidden so I don’t have to experience them. When I do this though, I need to keep using more and more drugs to keep the pain from coming back up. Sometimes we go through our lives in a daze convincing ourselves that this is how life should feel, and in my life, I did this for years and I escaped everything, even the ability to find joy in things. When I first decided to get clean and sober, the pain from withdrawal didn’t let me focus on any emotional pain. After I got through detox, however, the painful emotions from grief that I had stuffed for all that time started to come up. This is when I had to make a choice to follow through with facing truth or staying in sorrow. SOCD has helped me identify my emotional baggage and also helped me along the way as I worked through these issues. I am forever grateful to SOCD because if they weren’t there for me I might not be here.