Before addiction, I used to be positive. I was happy, optimistic, and enthusiastic. Even when circumstances around me weren’t ideal, I’d still manage to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Once addiction crept into my life – like a predator pouncing its prey, I became fearful, pessimistic, uncertain, and doubtful. Addiction stripped me of my positivity until all that remained was negativity. I perceived the world, and people, differently; I became suspicious and resentful, all of which was my own doing. It’s a funny thing, that when I have no one else to blame but myself, I find fault and blame in everyone but me. This is something that’s still a struggle today. With my brother and friend’s death, a pandemic, quarantine, fear, protests, riots, and economic uncertainty, positivity has been hard to come by. Instead of looking at what I don’t have, maybe I should start looking at what I do have.