Hope was something I didn’t have much of before I got sober. I’d been running on empty for a long time. The wreckage and destruction I’d been creating was piling up on me and before I knew it, I’d lost everything. In the beginning I used drugs to feel better, then I used them so I didn’t have to feel at all. I had a hole in my heart and I’d try to fill it with anything and anyone that would give me some relief from all of the pain I was feeling. It’s safe to say that before I got clean, I was completely and utterly hopeless. My life was falling apart. I’d lost my job. I’d lost custody of my daughter. My significant other was incarcerated. My sense of self-worth and dignity were basically non-existent. The way I saw it, I had two choices: get clean or end my life. I sat in my hospital bed, having just given birth, and prayed. I didn’t know if I believed in God or that my prayers were going to be answered, but I prayed anyway. In my case, desperation truly was a gift. I picked up the phone and I asked for help. Before I knew it, I was on my way to treatment. I was on my way to recovery. It’s my belief today that God lead me to South Orange County Detox & Treatment that night. To me, hope means having trust in a Higher Power. Hope means choosing to focus on the positive rather than the negative. Hope is giving up my life to God on a daily basis because I trust He will take care of me and guide me toward a life worth living. I’ve seen first-hand the impact that hope can have on my life. My life is not perfect, most days are really hard, but I know if I stay sober and trust in the process that things will continue to get better and better. Having hope sometimes just means no longer being hopeless. It means choosing life, choosing my daughter, and choosing God.