The last time I experienced a spiritual emergency was the days leading up to checking into South Orange County Detox and Treatment. I believe this was a Kriya because I was mentally, physically, and spiritually broken. I knew that I couldn’t go on living the same day over and over trying to keep up with my management of “normalcy”, otherwise known as numbing. The moment I found out the Salina was able to take me in I had the strangest moment of relief, I sighed in exhaustion! I knew I had made a decision that would help better my mind, body and soul. There is only so much pain and abuse that one can take, my Kriya was the turning point that made me call South Orange County Detox and Treatment and take back my life.
For the most part, my life has lacked true spiritual experiences. It wasn’t until I got sober that I began to have small spiritual awakenings, where at times I felt an enlightened state of being. Unfortunately, things would make sense for that moment, then slowly fade away. Sometimes I would feel as if I’m going in and out of different states of Kriya, as my spirituality has been hard for me to define. I’ve realized that although I am sober, I can still be a delusional narcissist who has a problem mixing up spirituality with my delusions or my selfish thinking. I used to think that I was a spiritual person but it wasn’t until I came to South Orange County Detox & Treatment where I realized I was going about spirituality the wrong way and that I have actually been in a “spiritual crisis”. Now that I am 4 months sober, I am doing my best to not constantly think about myself and keep a selfless attitude. In the past, I’ve committed to praying on and off but this week I’ve been praying everyday and waiting for God to answer, in whatever way He sees is best for me. The difference now is that I am more in-tune with Kriya in my life. I’m praying for God to guide me instead of praying for things I want. I believe that this new awareness of “Kriya” in my journey, is telling me that that I’m ready for the next step in my spiritual growth.